You could have played in any parallel universe, but you picked the JJ verse. Vulcan is gone there, that's a fact, Romulus not necessarily, so I started to wonder.
I have an answer for this too.
We're not in the JJ verse. We're in our own universe that while similar to events in the JJ verse is decidedly different from it because our character, their children, and their ancestors are a part of our timeline.
We combined ideas from not only the JJ verse, but the normal verse and a lot of stuff from the book series. Oh we also threw in a dash of the MMORPG for the heck of it.
The JJ verse spans less than 50 years.
Our verse is far more expansive and some of those differences between the standard verse and the JJ verse are in that time line.
We included the Jumbo Enterprise, but by the time that we get to our time, the ships are the size of the original universe ships. This is also addressed in the timeline.
The Excalibur class is another example. It comes from the MMORPG. Was created earlier for our RPG and based off the JJ Enterprise only made the size of the Original enterprise because we said technology progressed and allowed some things to be miniaturized.
Our warp cores are closer to the single core of the prime timeline than the multi pods of the JJ verse.
We have all that information in our heads and allowed some to be put into the various notes, but I think that there are more people that want just the facts as it pertains to their writing than those that want to know everything in the story.
As for the events not being mentioned... I have an answer to that too.
A lot of people died without warning. Why would they blame the Federation? It's not as if the romulans that we encountered had inside information as to what was happening and what people were doing to prevent it. If they did, do you really think that they would have been on Romulus?
The people in power that might have known what was going on are mostly dead or missing. Again the fact that a ultra nova was pending and would destroy everything isn't something that the general public would have been told.
That's a great example of trying to apply OOC information to an In Character situation.
You as a reader and a writer might know something, but you should never make the mistake of assuming that everyone else in the universe knows what you know.
Most of the governments on present day earth don't tell their citizens everything. It has been shown on screen and in books that the Romulans share even less with their people.
It has also been shown in the last season that even though one Romulan empire has been an ally with the federation for a while now, people still haven't gotten past their trust issues.
I can see that you would like some responsibility for what happened to be seen on screen, but again, why would it if the people don't know who to blame. All they know is that a ultra nova destroyed a chunk of Romulan Space. The Ultra nova is a natural disaster as far as they are concerned. There is also no publically known way to stop a super nova.
Again, in the minds of the people, who do you blame for not stopping something when you don't know what was going on behind the scenes?
Do you think that the Romulans would have advertised their problems or that the Federation was helping? That doesn't seem like the Romulan thing to do.
I know not seeing the answers might be a little irritating, but we're focused on the story of the characters and how they interact with the universe around them. If it becomes important to the story to hit on these questions, we will, but with the way things are now, it's just not that important.
People are more focused on trying to live than trying to find if there was some secret failed plot to save the empire and placing blame on the people that failed to succeed.